back.to.work.

well, here i am. work. not quite sure what that is just yet, as i’m waiting for my co-workers to arrive, and my phone has been (thankfully) silent. i’ve missed a lot in the last 6 weeks, that much i’m sure of. i’ve looked over the calendar and noticed quite a few things that we were in the planning stages for when i last was here have been started. which means travel is coming quickly.

this might be difficult to do with the present state of things, but i’m sure my boss is well aware of this. hopefully, i’ll be ready to travel in a couple weeks, it looks like we’re making slow going of it anyhow.

today is also B’s first solo day since march, and i’ve already made the wake-up and obligatory “back-up wake-up” calls. hopefully she’s gotten our oldest up and is getting him into the van as i write this. i’m trying not to be too pushy, so i’m not going to call her again until 8:30. her mother will be there today to help out, watching our youngest (the middle is still in reno with my parents, being spoiled rotten) while she is in therapy today. three days of that left, then we’re left to our own devices…..i think…we’ll see how things go today, as they could be real bad as well, as yesterday proved.

mother’s day was not as great as it could have been. i didn’t have an agenda, we had planned to play it easy and slow, going to the flea market, the lake, having a picnic lunch there, then heading home and doing a little work on the yards. the first item on our list happened, then depression set in. no, it wasn’t an exciting day, but i did get her to do some things. by the time we were done, though, it was already 1pm and she was already having a raging headache. so much for the lake. but that’s ok, i was happy to just be doing something. of course, she didn’t see it that way, she became miserable that she was miserable, and no way out of that circle was present. the headaches didn’t help.

hopefully that was one of the worst “bad days” she’ll have, it’ll be alright and we’ll be able to make it through them on the road to well-being. i do anticipate worse days, and those will be hard to take. i’m just grateful to be able to be there for her, i hope she’s grateful in return, though she’ll probably never tell me anyway. someday, we’ll look back on this and see it as a strenghtening experience.

-e